“Every action you take is a vote for the person you wish to become.” ~James Clear, Atomic Habits
I’ve weathered plenty of professional storms over the years, but only in the last five have I discovered the power of regular, meaningful reflection. The kind that builds genuine resilience over time.
Why did it take me so long? I still wonder about that, but I land on something simple – I didn’t know it could help, so I never made time for it. I always thought resilience was just about surviving.
Now I reflect daily through some simple journaling, and when I skip it, I feel the difference immediately.
When I ask leaders what resilience means to them, I hear familiar responses:
- “Put your back into it more.”
- “Face the storm, head down.” (kinda like what you see a herd of buffalo do)
- “I don’t quit.”
These chants feel good in the moment – they help us “find another gear” – but they’re short-lived. They don’t help us adapt to what we’ve experienced or integrate what we’re learning.
True resilience reminds me of weathered, calloused hands from lots of work in the gym. Built through consistent work over time, these callouses are tough and protective. But here’s what most people miss: even the toughest callouses need care. You sand them down, apply moisturizer, tend to them – because without maintenance, they crack and tear.
The same is true for resilience. It’s not just about enduring; it’s about intentionally processing our experiences so we can keep doing the work we love without breaking down.
Reflection is that maintenance. It’s how we process challenges, extract lessons (i.e., wisdom), and strengthen our capacity to handle whatever comes next.
Here are 3 experiments you can try today:
1. End-of-Day Check-Out (5 minutes) Before powering down for the day, take 3 minutes to ask these questions: “What challenged me today, and what did I learn from it?” Write down one insight. “What happened today? How did I feel? What did I learn? What will I do differently?”
2. Weekly Reflection Review (15 minutes) Every Friday, review your daily insights. Look for patterns. What’s working? What needs adjustment? This is an action for what you want to become – you’re building your resilience toolkit.
3. The Resilience Reframe When you’re facing a challenge, pause and ask: “How is this experience building me up for future challenges?” This simple reframe turns challenges into training. Remember, it’s all practice.
Resilience isn’t just about surviving – it’s about getting wiser for the future. And that wisdom comes from the daily practice of reflection, the quiet maintenance that keeps our weathered, calloused hands strong enough for whatever work lies ahead.
It’s taken me a long time to learn that, and I hope it’s helpful to you.
See you in 2 weeks.
Here are a few resources that I’ve found interesting and have been sharing with clients:
1 // I’ve been posting a “check out question” on Fridays on LinkedIn for over 75 straight weeks. Here’s a recent question that had a lot of responses. (1 min read)
2 // You can build resilience every day by focusing on small wins. (5 min read)
3 // Does setting a “rejection goal” sound crazy? If it does, you’ll probably learn something from this article. (5 min read)
