In coaching, experiments are part of the work we do. Nothing is permanent; everything is a trial – we can always choose to go back to the way we were.
Many leaders want to be better – they want to add presence, confidence, or better boundaries, among other things. You might look at yourself “lacking” these things.
Or do your beliefs about what you need to be, hold you back?
Like needing to have all the answers (credibility), hold feedback (fear of tension), stay in control (keep things moving), or not showing vulnerability (authority).
What if the answer to getting to that version of “better” isn’t a fix, but an experiment that you design for yourself?
Here are some things to keep in mind with experiments you design for yourself:
- They should be safe to try – experiments help you practice “psychological risk-taking”.
- They should be a little uncomfortable – they’re going to challenge your assumptions, beliefs, and habitual behaviors – expect some pinchiness.
- They’re not pass / fail – the experiment is more for learning than anything else.
- They might feel slow, but you will transform faster. Experiments disrupt an immunity to change that’s built into all of us, designed to keep the “norm”, to protect us.
Experiments help you help yourself, especially when you include others – here are a few ways they’re so internally powerful:
- They feed autonomy. (“I choose to try this.”)
- They build competence. (“I’m building capability through practice.”)
- They develop relatedness. (“I’m inviting others into my learning.”)
Transforming yourself into a better leader doesn’t happen by intention alone or wishing it to happen – it comes through safe, learning experiments.
Reply to this with an experiment you’re running for yourself, I’d love to hear about it and support you!
See you in 2 weeks.
Here are a few resources that I’ve found interesting and have been sharing with clients:
1 // We’re all “bundles of habits”, and over time, might not like the invisible habits that drive us. (5 min read)
2 // Is the story you’re telling yourself helpful? (1 min read)
3 // Can you allow yourself to examine what is “enough”? (19 min podcast)
